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Lying in a pram I am travelling backwards. I see my mother in front of me.  Cars hum on my right. Shop doors and windows pass on my left. If my mother was pushing me in the opposite direction, then the traffic would be on my left and shops would be on my right. I am about six months old.

 

Here I am, aware that I am in this body. What is this miracle of embodied consciousness? Weird yet exciting things going on around me. Trying to make sense of it all. A friend once commented that I seem to live in a state of continual surprise. It feels like that.

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Who are we? Why do we have such a hard time? How can we be kinder to each other and live more harmoniously with each other and nature? How can we find wiser, more resilient ways to engage with life’s challenges? Exploring these questions has driven my life.

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Buddha’s Teachings (Buddhadharma)

Buddha’s teachings are vast and profound, concerned principally with the nature of suffering and how to permanently alleviate it to find the lasting happiness and peace of awakening or enlightenment. There is no mention of a supreme creator. Some feel that Buddhism is not a religion at all, but more of a psychology or philosophy. To understand the relationship between Buddhism and the arts, it is helpful to have a basic knowledge and understanding of some of Buddha’s teachings, particularly the Four Noble Truths and the Noble Eightfold Path.

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Looking deeply into the nature of suffering, the Buddha saw its cause and discovered that when suffering and delusion dissolve, the enlightened nature of mind in all sentient beings is revealed, rather in the way the open, bright, spacious sky is revealed when clouds disperse. For Buddhists, enlightenment involves uncovering something already within us. Rather than actively creating something new or searching for something outside of oneself, anyone can realise this state with motivation, perseverance and training. Freeing oneself from suffering is a process of becoming aware and letting go of one’s own ignorance, aggression, greed, pride and jealousy. to reveal what has naturally been there – but concealed - all along: the compassionate, blissful, awake, knowing, empty essence of mind inherent in all living beings.

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(Insert Dharma teachings on 8 consciousnesses and awareness here)

 

October 1962, Hove, UK
Eight years old, I am sitting on a metal chair next to my mother, who sits blankly on another metal chair in a depressingly dark, Victorian-style hospital waiting room with high ceilings and gloss painted walls. No one else is there. A handsome young doctor in a white lab coat appears and gently tells my mother she has pneumonia and pleurisy and should be immediately admitted to hospital. We learn the next day she has tuberculosis and must go to an isolation hospital and that only Phil, my step father, can visit her. I go with her in the taxi to the hospital. Ten minutes later she waves goodbye to me from a window two floors up. I weep.

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My two-year old sister is put in foster care until it becomes clear she also has TB. At this point she joins mum in hospital. My fourteen-year old brother is living with our grandparents. Most cold, winter evenings Phil devotedly visits mum in hospital, leaving me alone for two hours in front of the telly with a paraffin heater (electric heating is too expensive), a hot water bottle, food, matches and a candle in case there is a power cut. It is the winter of the big freeze, with several feet of snow, black mould on walls and regular power cuts.

 

My whole world has collapsed. Everything seems very dark, very scary, unreliable and freezing cold. There is nothing to hold onto for comfort except food, so I am getting fat. The following April my mother returns home, but things continue to feel damp, dark and scary, exacerbated by her manipulative personality, frequent illnesses and the deepening poverty that followed after our increasingly depressed step-father gives up his job to look after us all.

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Impermanence and loss have arrived on my doorstep. I begin to experience deep suffering, the first Noble Truth as taught by the Buddha.

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(Insert Dharma teachings on 1st Noble Truth on suffering and impermanence here)

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Beginning interests in spirituality and art

From age eleven, attending an uptight Christian grammar school while trying to make sense of seemingly never-ending financial and dysfunctional family problems stimulate chronic anxiety, panic, depression and an obsession with Big Questions such as ‘Who am I/we?’, ‘What is the meaning of life?’, ‘Why do all these awful things happen to people, including me?’ which I discuss intensely with anyone willing.

 

At thirteen I have an AHA moment understanding that everything is interdependent and that how things seem to be depend on my state of mind. We create our own reality, so reality is just a matter of attitude. Although a profound insight, I have no idea how to use it to help myself or anyone else be wiser or happier. Very Buddhist, although I do not encounter Buddhism for another twenty years.

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(Insert Dharma teachings on 2nd Noble Truth, the causes of suffering here)

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I am 14. Interests in art, drama and dance begin emerging, enabling me to express pent-up emotions in a socially acceptable way. My grandmother pays for drama classes and arranges for a kindly old school friend to whisk me regularly around world-class art galleries, theatres and restaurants in London. I am so grateful and inspired. My head of art at school helps me keep going with art and survive yet another family trauma when I am sixteen: the suicide of my dear brother.

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Impermanence is no longer a house guest; it is a bedfellow and shadow. The world, including family, is not a solid, safe or reliable place. I am a psychological mess, but as there is no therapy or meditation around in 1971, I remain a psychological mess.

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(Insert Dharma teachings on the suffering of change here)

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Years of pent-up, repressed energy blow: I rent a cheap bedsit in a sleazy area of Brighton above a photography shop where I work. This is not a popular move with my mother, as her compliant little girl has suddenly become uncontrollable and disinterested in maintaining a symbiotic relationship with her.  I am on a roll, experiencing anything interesting and profitable which comes my way. This includes taking LSD, cannabis, amphetamines, being a stripper earning good money travelling Europe, a property-owning seaside landlady, owning Danny, an adorable golden cocker spaniel, being a freelance illustrator, and a marriage which ends with my alcoholic, psychotic husband’s suicide. 

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What about artistic creativity? Designing and making impressive costumes, choreographing exotic dance shows and renovating derelict houses have been creative outlets providing money, power, ego inflation, and - most importantly - an illusion of the security I craved. LSD has opened my mind beyond conventions and there is no turning back from that. The wild life has been an exciting experience and much-needed release from childhood constraints. Conventional nine to five existence with a job, mortgage and 2.5 children in a blissful nuclear family seems like a prison. I want to do something more personally meaningful.

 

I am thirty years old.

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(Insert Dharma teachings on the basic desire for happiness and how seeking lasting happiness in impermanent phenomena is fruitless here)

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Waking up (a bit)

I am also still miserable, confused, anxious, depressed and selfish. What to do? After my alcoholic husband’s suicide, I wake up sufficiently to ask why these repeated dramas are happening to me. Once more obsessed by the Big Questions and utterly overwhelmed by repeated traumas, I go on a Theravadin Buddhist retreat without really understanding any of it, but everyone is very kind. A seed is sown.

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A Jungian psychotherapist befriends me, and while not being my therapist, becomes a surrogate mother crucial in helping me reorient towards a wiser way of living based on recognising how we create our own reality. I explore psychotherapy and art therapy and bioenergetics therapy and gestalt therapy. I read new age books, self-help books, study spiritual healing, paint, write copious journals, rent rooms in my house to therapists and university students, and embark on an intense spiritual search dipping my toes in the wisdom teachings within Judaism, Christianity and Hinduism.

 

 

 

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Buddhism and the Arts

Extract from a short paper Zangmo wrote on Buddhism and Art that was commissioned by Arts Council England in 2006:

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About Buddhism

The teachings given by Siddhartha Gautama at the Deer Park at Varanasi, India 2500 years ago have now spread worldwide, resulting in a rich tapestry of traditions which can seem quite confusing. Buddhism is a peace loving, compassionate spiritual path, so to bridge differences between its various traditions and to work together, representatives from all Buddhist schools convened at the World Buddhist Sangha Council, Sri Lanka 1966 and unanimously reached agreement that:

“We admit that in different countries there are differences with regards to the life of Buddhist monks, popular Buddhist beliefs and practices, rites and ceremonies, customs and habits. These external forms and expressions should not be confused with the essential teachings of the Buddha.”

Buddhism can be seen as a tree with one trunk and many branches and roots, the trunk symbolising the essential spiritual teachings, and the many branches symbolising the different traditions which have grown from that trunk to meet the needs of different cultures and individuals.

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The Basics of Buddhism

To understand the relationship between Buddhism and the arts, it is helpful to have a basic knowledge and understanding of some of Buddha’s teachings, particularly the Four Noble Truths, the Noble Eightfold Path, the Vinaya and the different schools of Buddhism and their location.

​

Buddha’s Teachings (Buddhadharma)

Buddha’s teachings are vast and profound, concerned principally with the nature of suffering and how to permanently alleviate it to find the lasting happiness and peace of nirvana or enlightenment. There is no mention of a supreme creator. Some feel that Buddhism is not a religion at all, but more of a psychology or philosophy.

Looking deeply into the nature of suffering, the Buddha saw its cause and discovered that when suffering and delusion dissolve, the enlightened nature of mind present in all sentient beings is revealed, rather in the way the open, bright, spacious sky is revealed when clouds disperse. For Buddhists, enlightenment involves uncovering something already within one, rather than actively creating something new or searching for something outside of oneself, and anyone can realise this state with motivation, perseverance and training. It is a process of becoming aware of and letting go of one’s own ignorance, aggression, greed, pride and jealousy to reveal what has naturally been there – but concealed - all along: the compassionate, blissful, awake, knowing, empty essence of mind inherent in all living beings.

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Central to this are teachings on the nature of mind and phenomena which include emptiness, impermanence and interdependence: very subtle and easily misunderstood topics where it is easy to go astray. Buddha constantly admonished his followers to not take his word for granted, but to investigate his teachings for themselves, so Buddhists need to study the teachings and learn meditation from realised teachers in order to gain a correct understanding, experience and direct, personal realisation of these subjects.

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Three traditional divisions of the Buddha’s teachings:

1. Sutras: Buddha’s spoken word as recorded by his monks

2. Vinaya: Buddha’s teachings on how monks, nuns and laypeople should conduct themselves

3. Abidharma: a complex classification of Buddhist psychology

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The 4 Noble Truths

The basics of Buddha’s teachings, found in the Dhamma Cakka Pavattana Sutra or Discourse on Turning the Wheel of Dharma, are the Four Noble Truths:

• ​The truth of suffering (dukkha): we all suffer physically and mentally to a greater or lesser extent eg birth, old age, sickness, death, getting what we don’t want, not getting what we do want and the associated emotional pain of lust, anger, hatred, pride, envy, sadness, stress and so on.

• The origin, or root of suffering: looking deeply at the fundamental cause of suffering, our own deluded minds

• The cessation of suffering: what causes lasting happiness

• The path leading to the cessation of suffering: training in the path that leads to lasting happiness. This is the Noble Eightfold Path – right view, right thinking, right speech, right action, right effort, right mindfulness, right concentration, right livelihood. ‘Right’ in this sense means what is beneficial.

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The Noble Eightfold Path

This includes training in the Noble Eightfold Path, which is the foundation for the Buddhist way of life, the basics of which are to avoid negative actions, practise positive actions and to tame the mind. As the eight practices are interdependent, the aim is to practise them together, improving the quality of practice as one goes along:

1. Right View Deeply understanding the Four Noble Truths. Right view is the basis for right thinking, right speech and right action.

2. Right Thinking Right thinking is the foundation for Right Speech and Right Action

3. Right Speech Speaking truthfully, avoiding shouting, slandering, or speaking in a way which causes hatred or suffering, not exaggerating, not being divisive. Has to be informed by Right Thinking.

4. Right Action This means our many actions of the body. Informed by Right View, this involves practising loving kindness and compassion towards ourselves and others, and avoiding intentionally harming ourselves or others, including animals. A vast range of practices are included here including generosity, sexual responsibility, being mindful about what we eat, drink and consume, not killing or stealing.

5. Right Mindfulness Learning to be aware and pay attention to the present moment all the time. In the Satipatthana Sutra, Buddha gives four objects for mindfulness practice: our bodies, our feelings, our mind and objects of our mind

6. Right Diligence This is the effort that Buddhists put into realising the Noble Eightfold Path. Rather than putting effort into acquiring wealth or fame, which do not permanently alleviate suffering, Buddhists put effort into joyfully nurturing their practice.

7. Right Concentration Cultivating a one pointed mind which is neither too dull nor too agitated

8. Right Livelihood The way of earning a living without breaking precepts or vows that one has taken. “The Sutras usually define Right Livelihood as earning a living without…dealing in arms, in the slave trade, or poisons; or making prophesies or telling fortunes.”

 

Exactly how one might practise the Noble Eightfold Path depends on which tradition one is practising within and any vows taken :​

Teachings collected into the Pali Canon:
The Theravada school, or teachings of the elders, emphasises moral discipline, ethics and impermanence. Found in Sri Lanka, Burma, Thailand, Cambodia and Indonesia and the west

Mahayana

Includes Theravada but emphasises compassion, emptiness and concern for others, especially training in bodhichitta, which is the compassionate wish to attain enlightenment for the benefit of all beings.

Vajrayana

Tibet, Bhutan, Korea, China, Japan, Vietnam and the west. Encompasses Theravada and Mahayana traditions, while emphasising tantra and the nature of mind teachings of Mahamudra and Dzogchen to bring about complete enlightenment in a much shorter time. Tibet, Bhutan, northern India, Nepal, southwestern China, Mongolia, and, parts of Russia, Shingon Buddhism in Japan

The cultural influences of the country one practises in

In some traditions there is a crossover; for example the Tibetan tradition includes Theravada, Mahayana and Vajrayana practices of the Eightfold Path within its tradition. It is important to remember that all traditions agree upon the essential teachings of the Buddha, even though outer forms of practice may differ

The Vinaya are the teachings of the Buddha on how monks, nuns and laypeople should conduct themselves. The specific rules which Buddhists follow regarding behaviour depend on which sets of vows they have or have not taken. This could vary from 3 vows for a layperson holding basic Refuge vows to over 250 vows for a fully ordained monk or nun. For example, some Buddhists have taken a vow not to drink alcohol, while others have not taken this vow. Monks and nuns are not permitted to sing and dance in a secular context, but some do take part in performances involving religious dance, chant and sand mandala

 

The Relationship between Buddhism and the Arts​​​

Purpose of Traditional Buddhist Art

Buddhism offers many training methods, including the arts, for guiding individuals towards enlightenment, and all traditional Dharma art is intended to be reminders and inspiration pointing the individual towards the ultimate nature of phenomena and the ultimate nature of mind.

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A non-Buddhist seeing a Buddhist bow to a statue of a Buddha or Bodhisattva might assume this is idol worship, but for the Buddhist who has an understanding of the Four Noble Truths and practises the Noble Eightfold Path, prostration is a profound practice which includes surrendering egotism and the delusions of pride, arrogance, greed and ignorance preventing enlightenment, and holding a wish to become like the Buddha, a recognition of the Buddha within and much more. For example, to recognise and respect the expression of serenity and compassion on the face of a Buddha statue is a reminder to respect and develop these qualities within oneself. It is not compulsory to have an image of the Buddha in order to practise the teachings of the Buddha, but many people find it a helpful inspiration:​

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‘Buddhism’s primary focus is on the Buddha’s teaching, not on the Buddha’s person. The most basic role of Buddha images is to convey the feeling of calm and detachment that reflects proper mental discipline with control over the negative emotions of fear and greed. The Buddha’s serene appearance sets an example for his followers.’

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and

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‘The image is an inspirational teaching intended to inspire Buddhists to develop in themselves mental discipline and serenity. In order to practise the teachings of the Buddha, a Buddha image is not compulsory: Buddha did not encourage people to develop a ‘personality cult’, but taught that Buddhists should not depend on others, even on the Buddha himself – for their salvation.’

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and

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‘Sacred image was not meant to be the object of idolatry. For knowledgeable Buddhists the image of the Enlightened One embodied the realisation of potentialities that lay latent in every sentient creature. The ultimate responsibility for gaining that realisation rested on the shoulders of each individual.’

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Buddha images and other Buddhist art showing, for example, the life of the Buddha, also serve educational purposes in areas of low literacy, helping people to understand the teachings and reducing suffering.

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Many people who make Buddhist art regard it as a spiritual practice, for in order to make truly sublime work, it helps if one meditates and has the right view and intention from the outset.

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The aim of Buddhist art is to inspire and remind: a Buddhist artist practising the Eightfold Path would be aiming to express the qualities of the enlightened mind through their work, with no interest in personal fame or originality for its own sake, as this would be counter to Buddhist practice.

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Visual Arts

Traditional Buddhist art forms made to complement and enhance traditional practices found in temples, monasteries, centres, hermitages, the home and places of retreat.

These art forms are still practised and can include wall and scroll paintings, sculpture, carvings, textiles, hand crafted ritual implements, illustrated sacred texts and poetry. Traditional paintings and statues of Buddha, bodhisattvas and principal or revered teachers are made to iconometric proportions in some traditions such as the Tibetan, while in others, such as Zen, the traditional forms are more freely interpreted. Wood, metal and clay are often used to make ritual or sacred objects. More recently, photography has been used to make inspirational records of pilgrimage sites and principal teachers.

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From its origins until 1st Century CE there are no found representations of the Buddha, although there are surviving early symbols of the Buddha and Buddhist teachings (Buddhadharma) such as pillars decorated with Buddhist symbols, stupas and sculptures representing Buddha’s life. Buddhist art continues to be full of symbolism including the Stupa, 8 auspicious symbols, lotus, footprints of the Buddha, Vajra and Bell, light, Bodhi tree, empty throne, columns, lions, mudras (hand gestures), deer, 5 elements. From around 1st Century CE statues of Buddha were made in Pakistan and central Northern India, and China, where a rich and creative heritage of sculpture and painting developed. Vietnamese Art shows a strong Chinese influence.

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Buddhism arrived in Korea in the 6th Century, and although influenced by China, Korean Buddhist Art is more restrained. Korean Son Art “tries to express what speech cannot - the true nature of reality, the experience of which is the goal of Son. Son painting is completely unpredictable, except for Bodhidharma and the Oxherding Pictures. This is done through spontaneity, included in the Buddhist values incorporated in the training.”

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Japan was introduced to Buddhism in the 6th Century. From the 12th Century Zen art, which considered almost any human activity as spiritual, produced art in many forms including Sumi-ye painting, haiku poetry (which although not Zen literature, has nevertheless been influenced by Zen ), calligraphy, pottery, ikebana (art of flower arrangement), gardening and later on, the Tea Ceremony.

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Tibet, where Buddhism arrived in 8th Century, whose best known art forms include Thangkha Painting and statuary. Other arts forms include butter sculpture for ritual use, painted and sand mandalas, masks, prayer wheels, metal and wood craftwork, sculpture, poetry.

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From 1st to 7th Centuries Thai Buddhist painting and sculpture were influenced by India, following which Cambodia Khmer and Sri Vijaya, both Mahayana, were the main influences.

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Spontaneous art by realised practitioners

There is a long tradition of practitioners expressing their realisations and teaching others through spontaneous song, dance and painting which may or may not have a traditional form. For example in India there was a tradition of masters such as Saraha singing spontaneous songs (dohas) of realisation, often as a teaching to a student, and in Tibet the yogi Milarepa was famous for his ‘Hundred Thousand Songs’ which he sang to teach nomads, farmers, monastics and yogis as well and to express his own realisations.

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Art produced by contemporary Buddhist artists whose work is concerned with themes from Buddha’s teaching

Contemporary artists, who may or may not be practising Buddhists, may use traditional or contemporary forms separately or in combination eg film/sculpture/painting used together in an installation piece. While there may be a deeply felt spiritual context to the work, it would not necessarily be intended to go in a monastery, centre or temple and would not have to be made according to iconometric recommendations.

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Buddhism was introduced to Europe and the USA in the 19th Century, with most traditions and their arts now being represented. Many well known western artists in the past century have been influenced by Buddhism; this has been recently documented in a book by Jacquelynn Baas and Mary Jane Jacob.

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While in the USA there is a strong culture of contemporary Buddhist art due to the influence of Zen and the Beat generation in the last century and more recently, Vajrayana Buddhism, contemporary Buddhist art is just emerging in the UK. There are over 151,816 Buddhists in the UK from culturally and racially diverse backgrounds and Buddhist organisations from all traditions ie Theravada, Mahayana and Vajrayana, all of which welcome people from all ethnic and cultural backgrounds.

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It is important not to confuse the Buddhist spiritual path with a particular culture. As mentioned earlier, the culture may influence practices and outer forms, but the essential teachings are the same, regardless of culture.

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Many contemporary artists also use themes such as impermanence, delusion, interdependence, compassion commonly studied in Buddhadharma, and may feel a link with Buddhist ideas without necessarily calling themselves Buddhist.

 

Geri:

Over the years as a writer and English teacher, I came to believe in the concept of getting out of one’s way and just doing—whether it’s writing or painting or any other activity that can be defined as “creative,” and I think that includes many of our activities on this earth. My introduction to the concept as an English teacher was Peter Elbow’s famous book Writing Without Teachers, which changed the way most teachers taught writing.  Forget the outline, the line-up of ideas, he said. You can’t know what you’re going to say until you see what you’re saying.  You don’t learn to dance by watching. You need to move your body.  The pen is in your hand.  The words, the phrases, the rhythms are yours.  And if you write long enough, you will find what Elbow calls a “center of gravity,” the thing that the writing seems to be about.  And from there, you can proceed.  Again. By free writing. 

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In her influential books Writing Down the Bones and Wild Mind: Living the Writer’s Life, Natalie Goldberg, a Zen Buddhist, asks for free writes with prompts like “Describe your first car… write for 20 minutes. Go.” In The Artist’s Way, Julia Cameron asks for three pages of writing every morning, “non-negotiable”. This may be a particular challenge for women or people who are caring for a family or working long hours.  This is one reason why we may need to start small.  Five minutes a day.  And if that’s all we can spare for awhile, so be it. But it is a transaction with oneself, moments of self-nurture that may help us to care for others without resentment, with the hope that they too find their way toward their joy. 

 

Both Goldberg and Cameron have a spiritual orientation.  Goldberg’s is Zen Buddhist; Cameron’s is Christian. They have a belief in the human spirit, the unconscious, the well of creativity in all of us that either flourishes or withers, which can be a force for good or a “shadow” force that can turn depressed or dangerous. 

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Zangmo NOTES​/ROUGH DRAFT

How does art-making support awareness in my own practice?

As someone who is using art materials with mind and awareness meditation as subject matter, my interest is as much in the process of making as in the product, as it evolves over moments, days, weeks, years. This interest in process began when I noticed over 30 years of making art, teaching art and coaching creativity that many of my students and clients were heavily focused on creating a 'good' end product when drawing, painting or engaging in other ways with art materials. This led them to feeling stressed, frustrated and unsatisfied. When asked what was going on, they often explained they were trying to create something which fitted in with their ideas of 'good art' according to the gospel of art critics, art historians and current cultural conditioning. Too many virtuoso demonstrations had been watched on TV and videos, creating the assumption that making a painting was akin to a virtuoso magic trick like pulling a rabbit out of a hat. Here's the blank paper, now TA-DA! here's a masterpiece. 

 

I experienced this too for a while. Why was I doing this? To prove something? To win approval, be told I was 'good' in the eyes of others and thus feel my life and efforts were not wasted? To feel I belonged to a peer group? To prolong the illusion of a sense of self and identity as an artist? How can using art materials ever be a personally meaningful, satisfying and authentic expression if we are trying to be someone other than just who we are? We can learn from others, be inspired by them, but if we try to be them this is impossible. We have to be ourself. Geri has mentioned this focus on end product as something which happened to her when doing art, less so with writing.

 

The creative process is not like that. This apparent 'hole-in-one' is not possible without years of practice: a concert pianist will tell you that. Even a Zen master calligrapher will have practised for years to have the mindset and skills to create a simple one-breath painting which moves us deeply and communicates profoundly. Or an accomplished figurative artist may have made countless drawings and studies planning the final piece. 

 

Trying to create a masterpiece, will usually be a frustrating experience, just  as trying to manufacture our idea of a perfect meditation experience will always be frustrating. The clinging to wanting to be good at art or meditation or anything else becomes the very block, or obstacle to it happening. Yes, we need the intention but lightly held, without desperation. Yes, ongoing practice, but again with a light touch, relaxed but not to the point where the energy and focus disappear. 

 

My students were so obsessed with the end product that they paid little attention to their ongoing evolving processes before, during and after playing with art materials. They were missing out on rich dimensions of experience that could help them develop not only as artists but also as people. They were not connecting deeply with themselves, but focusing outwards on the approval of others. What was happening with their sensory awareness? How connected were they with their feelings, thoughts and emotions? Some people say they lose a sense of self when doing art, but what exactly do they mean by this phrase? What is this self? What knows this self has been lost? And what about pure, timeless awareness beyond thought? Buddhist psychology teaches that pure awareness is unchanging, that it is always with us and cannot be lost, just not recognised.

 

However, the joy and connection with my essence that I experienced when using art materials went beyond all this conditioning and compelled me to keep making art. As I began to find ways of using art as a support for awareness, including making friends with all the cultural bullshit that I felt accompanied notions of 'good' art and making art, awareness of the conditioning itself became part of meditation and contemplation. 

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Life, not just art practice, is like that, it evolves organically and we need to make friends with our process of evolving as honestly and as kindly as we are able. 

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​We may need a balance of both process and product, such as when I decided the Mindweathersong diary process needed to be shared in a book form, meaning the process-driven early stages evolved into a more product-driven later stage. But when doing a creative activity for personal development, engaging more deeply with process offers the potential for satisfaction, healing and personal insight.

 

I have seen something similar with beginning meditators and more experienced ones including myself. Coming to a meditation session with expectations or the desire for whatever one considers a 'good' meditation to be will usually add to the tension in our mind and be completely unhelpful. 

 

Sometimes the process is the product.

• Aware of kleshas, grasping, confusion, resistances, blocks, conditioning.

• Is a hot house for self observation awareness practice

• Engaging with art materials brings me into the present moment

• Contemplating impermanence as I am aware of movement and change

• Contemplating interdependence as imputation of things changes as their relationships change

• Observing changes such as manifestation, kleshas, grasping, avaersion etc mind sets arising, along with learning to rest unchanging awareness

• Awareness of reactions to not knowing eg desire to control experience and outcomes

• Learning to be more comfortable with not knowing and being present and awar

 

How is dharma practice a support to my art practice?

• The training in awareness meditation helps me recognise it and practice with it when doing art or anything else

• Learning ways of working with kleshas in dharma practice give me a framework for working with kleshas in art practice

• Helps me understand how processes evolving in art practice are expressions of emptiness and form together, manifesting as impermanence, form and changing perceptions

 

Completed Previous Related Projects (needs rewriting and moving)

• Solo exhibition, The Photographers Gallery UK, Tell Me What You Are: Luminograms inquiring into perception and projections of mind, based on associations of concepts, thoughts, labels, ideas, beliefs, opinions, and the storylines we build around them to create and project our reality. How real or true are they? How do they cause suffering? How do they benefit us? 

• Solo exhibition: Horsham Arts Center UK, who invited me to make a new body of 30 pieces of art work for this exhibition, The Contemplative Eye

• Solo exhibition, at Michaelhouse Center, Cambridge, UK, Lyrical Abstraction by Zangmo Alexander 

• MFA degree course: Meditation Diary

• MFA degree show, Norfolk UK (distinction), Letter to my Mum, video: Before I ordained as a Buddhist nun, my mum asked me why I wanted to be a nun, so in reply I made this short video sharing my disillusionment, questioning the wisdom of relying on materialism for any lasting peace and happiness. 

• University of East Anglia, UK, The Stripper: collaboration with Dr Pema Clark who devised this one-hour play based on my life and work, about peeling away layers of delusion through spiritual practice

• Altered Family Album: A family photo album made from a cash book by my granddad. I added the yogic song Eight Things to Remember by the great yogi Milarepa, transforming the album into an object for contemplation on impermanence that would be very personal

Ongoing long-term projects within which shorter projects are situated

• What Remains? An inquiry, in artists’ book form, into the nature of mind, storylines and labels, self and identity

• Drawing As Meditation: Open awareness meditation as the starting point and process from which to draw

• Hotel: a study in transience and impermanence through the metaphor of my travels and hotels I have stayed in

• Liminal: investigating, through drawing, photography and text, the in-between states which permeate knowing and not knowing

• Stillness and Movement: The mind is either still (just aware, with few thoughts or emotions) or moving (more thoughts, emotions and energy movements). Drawing and painting from awareness of stillness-movement.

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